Alcohol Humor Satire Slurred Words

13 Hilarious Hidden Flasks To Put Your Alcohol In

So I recently stumbled across a very interesting product. There is a Reef sandal that doubles as a flask. At the beach, and need a little pick me up for your coke? No problem, there’s some rum in my sandal. At your kid’s piano recital, and need a shot to get through the other kids’ performances (because undoubtedly your kid is the only good one)? Don’t worry, you can take a shot from my sandal. This got me thinking more about hidden flasks. If we’ve gotten to the point of sandal flasks, there have to be other interesting products out there. Well, guess what? There certainly is, and I’m here to share these hilarious gems with you.

Reef Dram Sandal

1. Sunscreen Flasks

Perfect for summer, right? When you head out to the public pools and/or water parks that may or may not be tainted with urine, you’ll need to make use of these bad boys. Each holds 8 ounces of whatever booze you plan to booze up on.

Sunscreen Flasks

2. Lotion

Maybe you are not sitting out in the sun, which means the sunscreen facade won’t work. Not to worry! There are regular lotion flasks for that! No one at the grocery store or bank is going to question your skin condition. Each one of these holds 4 ounces of your favorite poison.

Hidden Lotion Flask

3. Scarf Flask

Maybe you want to incorporate a little style in your flask drinking. Check out this infinity scarf flask. Look how stylish this girl looks…while being blackout dunk.

Flask Scarf

4. Tie Flask

Don’t worry, fellas. I didn’t forget about you. Take a look at this tie flask. Make use of the 8 ounce “tie bladder” (their term, not mine) while you’re at work, or in a client meeting. You look very professional in your suit and tie, so no one will think you’re a boozer.

Tie Flask

5. Underwear Flasks (for Gents and Ladies)

What better way to hide booze, than near your bits and pieces?

Underwear Flask

6. Umbrella Flask

Something you can carry at all times, and there’s really no questions asked. The only issue is you won’t be able to drink in the rain.

Umbrella Flask

7. Tampon Flasks

This is my favorite, because if I were a hidden flask maker, I would never think to use tampons. I’m sure the designer of this one was promoted to head hidden flask maker, and he/she is working hard to try to find other¬†feminine hygiene products to turn into flasks. Each one holds 1 ounce, by the way.

Tampon Flask

8. Camera Flask

Maybe you are on a family vacation or something, and it’s not acceptable to drink all day. This 5 ounce camera flask will take care of that.

Camera Flask

9. Binocular Flask

Maybe you want to drink while birdwatching. Or maybe while you are stalking your neighbor, because you think they murdered someone, and you just need the proof.

Binocular Flask

10. Ice Pack Flask

Another good summer one. While you’re at you kids’ soccer games, you can pretend that you are chilling their juice boxes. In actuality, you’re drinking…and your kids’ juice is very warm.

Ice Pack Flask

11. Shampoo and Conditioner Flasks

These guys are specifically made for packing booze in your checked bag. I guess this would be because you are traveling to some foreign land that doesn’t allow alcohol. Like, Utah or something. 16 ounces of liquid can fit in each one!

Shampoo Flask

12. Hairbrush Flask

Since your shampoo and conditioner is nothing but booze, your hair is probably going to be all ratty. Here’s a hair brush for you. It doubles as a flask as well, because you obviously need alcohol all the time.

Brush Flask

13. Freedom Flask

Last, but not least…the Freedom Flask. I chose to showcase this baby for one reason. The awesome picture directly below. I’m pretty sure the flask does not have to be positioned exactly where that guy has it. And I’m not sure ladies would be dying to drink what he’s serving.

Freedom Flask

Freedom Flask

Well, there you have it. My list of hilarious hidden flasks. I had no idea there were so many amazing ways to hide your alcohol. I actually think I may get a few just to use at my parties. There will be no cups for my guests. Just the flasks. I think that will make for some good conversation.

About the author

The Lady Wine Gifted

My name is Jessica Trejo, and I'm not afraid to admit that I drink. That's why I'm Wine Gifted. I like talking and writing about wine and drinking!

1 Comment

Leave a Comment