I am willing to bet that the bulk of us have some kind of job, and I am sure that the bulk of that bulk take some kind of pride in what they do. But regardless of your burning pride or piercing dedication, I am sure that you still really enjoy when you get to take some time off from the daily grind. Wine Gifted is here to make a suggestion as to how you should spend your time off. It may not be surprising that it has to do with wine. If you follow these steps, you are sure to have an amazing day off.
PREPARE YOUR WINE THE NIGHT BEFORE
Yes, you’ll have to do some prep work to do no work. You spend so much time making decisions and/or crunching numbers and/or stroking egos…you need to make sure you are prepared for not thinking at all on your day off. Pick out 4 or 7 bottles of wine (make sure that at least 2 of these are champagne), and have them ready to go.
DON’T PUT ON ANY PANTS
And now onto your day off. You need to be as physically relaxed as possible. The only way to achieve ultimate relaxation is to make sure you breathe your legs like you would your finest wine (wink wink). Remain pantless all day. (Please note: you still will have to put on a decent shirt…maybe a turtle neck or something button-up with a collar. You’re not a barbarian.)
WATCH DAYTIME TELEVISION
This first half of the day should be mimosas and watching mindless television. This may involve stories in which a man has been in a coma for 5 years, and wakes up to find out his long lost evil twin has not only taken on his identity, but has also become a vampire, as well as the mayor of the city. (No joke…there are vampire and werewolf characters on soap operas now.)
GET THE MAIL
I know. This doesn’t sound very exciting. However, it is the only time of the day that you will experience the outdoors. It’s important to get some fresh air at least once in the day.
EAT A BIG LUNCH
Try to get your hands on some fried chicken or pizza or steak. Make sure to pair this food with big, bold reds (i.e. Cabernet Sauvignon or Zinfandel.) You’ve expelled a lot of energy getting the mail, and need to refuel.
TAKE A MIDDAY NAP
By this time, you are probably exhausted from all the wine and refueling. It’s time to catch a few z’s. If you don’t feel like walking to your bed, that’s fine. You’ll probably be able to sleep wherever you are at this point.
EAT A BIG DINNER
When you wake up from your nap, it will probably be several hours later and time for dinner. Try to eat some heavy pasta with red sauce. You’ll need red fruit wines to go with this (i.e Barbera or Nebbiolo.)
GO TO BED
The pasta and wine is probably sitting in your stomach like a rock. It’s probably good to hit the hay at this point. Take off your collared shirt and slip into a deep sleep. You’ll need all the rest you can get before you have to get up in the morning and call in sick to work.
I hope you’ve enjoyed your day off. The 5 hours or so that you were awake for it should’ve been awesome.