Sorry, anyone born outside of the early 1980s to the early 2000s range…you are not winning at wine. Details recently reported on the results of a survey about Americans and wine drinking, and it shows that Millennials love their wine the most. They’re in the wine bar more, they are at the bar the longest, and they’re buying more wine than anyone else. Wine Gifted couldn’t help but dig deeper into this phenomenon. We asked our Science department to look at some stuff, and tell us some things about the stuff they looked at. Here are the conclusions they came to as to why Millennials drink a lot of wine.
Millennials need to know the story behind everything. The internet feeds that need, and winemakers have taken notice. More wine retailers are using the internet to tell the authentic stories behind their wines, and they’re drawing in the Millennials because of it. The younger generation feels more connected to wine than ever before.
A History of Landlines, Pagers, and Dial-Up Internet
Millennials have experienced more change than other generations. They are a technologically savvy people; however, many have come from a time when phones were connected to walls through wires. Also, sometimes, they had to wait many minutes for a person to call them after a “911” page. Furthermore, almost all of them remember what it was like to suffer through the horrific screeching noise that came out of their dial-up modem as they waited for internet connection. They’ve seen and done a lot. These experienced Millennials are naturally drawn to an experienced drink…wine.
In an attempt to express individuality, and a refusal to conform to the norms of society, millions of Millennials banded together to create a uniform society of special snowflakes. With the help of grunge, overalls, clunky shoes, and participation trophies, Millennials learned that they could be anyone they wanted to be. They were given the confidence to break through any barrier in their way, including the one that designated the wine industry as one for snooty older rich people. Millennials made wine their b*tch, and it quickly became their grown-up participation trophy.
Statistical analysis performed by a University that may or may not be accredited and/or real showed that 96% of Millennials ate Taco Bell on a fairly regular basis when they were young. For many years of a Millennial’s life, the Double Decker Taco Supreme was the highest level of culinary excellence. Not surprisingly, this led to a deep desire for finer things in life. This is typically when a wine habit came to be.
Dave Matthews Band
Another statistical analysis performed by the same University as above, revealed that 98.2% of Millennials were exposed to Dave Matthews Band (DMB) music at some point in their youth. They learned that the smooth, melodic, impassioned music of DMB paired perfectly with chilling and smoking weed. As Millennials grew older, smoking weed and listening to DMB became socially unacceptable, so they had to settle for chilling, drinking wine, and secretly listening to DMB in the closet.
Beverly Hills 90210
Despite not really having anything in common with real teenagers, Brandon, Brenda, Kelly, Dylan, Donna, David, Steve, and Andrea shaped the minds and lives of Millennials for 10 years. As these Millennials became adults, they were devastated to realize that their lives were actually nothing like wealthy, thirty-something “teenagers” from Beverly Hills. The bulk of them became drinkers because of it.
What made us qualified to relay this information to you? The bulk of us at Wine Gifted are Millennials, and we know these things to be true. We’re actually not sure why we asked our Science department to look into this for us. What a waste of time and money.